I'm always intrigued with people and the decisions they make in life, whether that is a conscious choice or not or whether they let the external influences, or the Effects, change their behaviour in such a way that it actually harms them, but still continues ahead regardless.

What I mean by this is really how people behave and interact amongst themselves and between each other. I'm always fascinated by how when you can be logically speaking to someone about their choices and/or behaviours, but these will instantly change when other people are involved.

A classic example is the whole social scene where people go out to public gatherings endlessly for the purposes of sociability, fun and enjoyment. All this is of course aimed at getting a huge sharp and fast dose of happiness. A short term remedy, because as we all know, the deep long term fulfilled happiness comes with other kinds of activities.

I'm not saying this is a bad or a good thing. These are both different shots of happiness and will require different methods in order to achieve them, however, what always baffles me are those situations which get out of hand.

What do I mean by this?

Well take this for example, a common occurrence in any city of the world. You go out one evening to have a good time with a bunch of friends, and as the night progresses you have your fun, it's enjoyable, there is pleasant conversation and there is good music. As the near tears away, you drink more and more, and even more alcohol, to the extent that soon, that happiness is now turning sour, but do you stop? Not in the face of other people you don't.

Now I've seen some nasty situations in my life, and indeed I have myself been in deep drunk situations and amazingly managed to get home. The human body and unconscious mind is a powerful tool. We've all had those times when you are so drunk you can't even stand, but somehow you managed to get home, get your keys out, open the door, check you have your wallet and nothing is missing. Isn't that amazing!

I diverged. So you've reportedly had an amazing night, yet in the morning, the room stenches of a dark night, booze and perhaps even a slight smell of vomit mixed with cigarette. You've just spent the entire night with the aim of "having fun", spending time, money and energy, and in the end, you've ended up with a sore head, stinky clothes, puke on your jacket and a list of regrets. Not to mention the 2 hours of toilet hugging. This is your pursuit of short term happiness.

How is that a pleasant experience?

A lot of you know that I'm a teetotaller. It means I don't drink. It's not always been this way, but I'm certainly glad it is now. It's been 3 years and I'm totally pleased I made that choice.

Look at it from my perspective. I too head out for the same sociable night, enjoying the food, the atmosphere, the music of various venues. I'm having an awesome time, meeting new friends, having interesting conversations. As I move from place to place, I can take in all the fun around me and partake in the happiness created by myself and others around me. It's all good times. Dancing, conversations, interactions and enjoying people for who they really are. No slurred talk, no slouching or slobbering. As the night leads on, I'm still perfectly sober and still having a really good time, because I also know in my mind that I'm going to get a great nights rest at the end of all this socializing. I'll lie in bed remembering the fun and laughter and all those great conversations, and guess what, in the morning I'll still remember it all.

Furthermore, I will wake up refreshed and ready to tackle the next day and do more things I love doing that will add to my life happiness. Now I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty awesome way to live a life. I'm literally creating both short term and long term happiness and fulfilment the whole time.

Yes I hear you, it doesn't happen all the time, and you don't get drunk all the time. These so called "big night outs" are rare and don't affect my life in any way other than a good way. Are you really so sure? The damage you've done to your body will take more than a strong coffee to repair itself. Not to mention the actual cellular damage you've done to your brain. My head hurts. I don’t have an issue with partying with alcohol, however I do have an issue with people allowing the social environment to cloud their personal judgement beyond safety. These are the times you really wanted to stop, but something external, whether that is your friends or people around you, somehow influence your better judgement, often times without even having to say a single word.

Our lives are shorter than you think. It's time to realise that this is not the way to create that joy you are so desperately seeking. The only way is to realise yourself, be aware of your own inner voice and confront its fears and dispel them. Be at cause all the time in your life and ask yourself next time you are getting really out of control, whether that is alcohol or worse still, drugs, ask yourself this, "Is this what I REALLY want?".

What is true happiness to you?